Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Buy Your Manuscript

I FOUND THIS ON THE INTERNET
No kidding.

I'm-not-going-to-give-out-this-site.com is a library of over 70,000 essays, term papers, book reports, biographies and articles spanning over 190 categories. Members have these benefits:
  • Full essay details (size, grade, level)
  • Essays rated and commented
  • Exchange private messages & chat w members
  • Up to 100 new essays added daily
  • Comprehensive search engine
  • Immediate FULL access
  • Independently verfied
  • Privacy guarantee
  • We WON'T spam you
  • Fast customer support

  • Note the misspelled word *verfied*.

    Why write your own stuff when you can buy it. If I could get my next novel out of a vending machine, all my struggles would be over. Just put in the coins, punch the button and voila... manuscript ready to ship to the nearest agent.

    But why stop there? How about a vending machine for pets?

    Or the next great idea for personal transportation.

    How about more IQ points?

    What I really could use, though, is a machine that sells genius talent.

    3 comments:

    L.T. Elliot said...

    I'd like a vending machine full of time. Buy yourself an hour here or there. That'd be the life.

    Don said...

    Aw, man! You stole my idea! I want a time vending machine, too.

    (And I know I had the idea first, but didn't get around to posting, and you stole it from me!)

    But I was thinking more along uninterrupted writing time. :-)

    Jaime Theler said...

    This was great! I'll take one of L.T's time vending machines and I'd love one that spits out already sharpened pencils, because I spend so much time finding one for the kids every day during homework. And I even go through and sharpen them regularly, too! I think the kids sneak down at night and make them all dull for the next day.